Day 48

28 Apr


I fell asleep in the late afternoon sun and succumbed to the affliction of the Englishman who has seen little sunlight for a while.

I sit on one of the numerous scattered benches with a cup of coffee and a George. We watch the inmates play football and in the process kick-off with one another. The sound of studs on shin pad echo out with all the aggression the sound was created with.

Having taken in a cooked breakfast and a trip to an over-crowded gym session, my day is almost complete.

While the weights are heavily crowded , the CV (Cardiovascular) machines are often left collecting dust. With a capacity of 35 each session, its irritating to be denied access when all you want to do is sit of the rower. I’m surprised that it hasn’t been seen as logical to separate the two areas and run separate sessions. This would open up fitness to those who feel intimidated to exercise for fear getting int the shadows of the Alpha Males. Many of the older chaps here don’t want to have to fight to hold their spot in the queue with some of the steroid enhanced, tuna drinking, meat-heads that overpopulate the prison system. Darwin would have a seizure if he saw the evolutionary level of some of the inmates who vye for the limited gym places. Would blow his theory right out of the water.

That said, I guess there will always be the anomalies.


I love football but many don’t. The sports department gear a lot of fitness sessions around Soccer, so it’s with great irritation that our idea of ‘Touch Rugby’ was thrown out as an idea for being too dangerous.

I think they’ve miss the point of ‘TOUCH’ Rugby. The very game breaks down if you exceed this level of contact and it misses the point of having phases. Football however with it’s flying tackles, constant injuries requiring days out of the prison to physio’s and sneaky trips to the missus’; is allowed to crack on. This is the inconsistency of prison though, small minded people’s misapprehension of conflicting and perfectly straightforward regulations, means one prison encourages and another prohibits. This invariably wastes time further down the system when an inmate complains over blocked property and why he’s not allowed his shin pads now.

As George and I sit there talking about the Proceeds of Crime Act and Confiscation Orders; I think again about the notion of ‘Touch Rugby’ being two violent – about the same time, two inmates limp off the field of play after chasing a round ball.

Prison Logic.

Quote Good

Back in the billet, banged up for bed, Spence tells me a line he read on a cell wall when he was in Cat A Woodhill.

“They can lock the locks, but they can’t stop the clocks”

I think it’s mint, I write it down. It says everything about the mind of a prisoner sat in a Bang-Up, thinking of the time they’ve got to serve.





Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: